A Letter to my Teenage Self

Dear Alisa,

I know you’re a teenager and you think you know EVERYTHING, but let me tell you something, You DON’T! You literally know nothing about life yet.  You barely know how to put your hair in a pony tail without your mommy helping; didn’t you just learn how to cut your own steak last week?  Seriously, drop the know-it-all attitude, put on some big girl panties and man up!

Here’s some things I think you need to know to help you out:

That boy that told you that you should go work at The Gap because you had a gap in your teeth, well he’s in prison now and you turned out so much better!

Don’t care what anyone thinks about you.  Now, this doesn’t mean you should go streaking through the quad or anything like that, but remember what people say is ONLY their opinion, that’s all! It doesn’t mean it’s actually true.

Have ONE best friend that you can be 100% Honest with, this will keep you sane!

Try not to be so freaking Opinionated; I know I told you that you shouldn’t care what people think, but 99.9% of the people in your class of 54 don’t think the way you do so just SHUT IT DOWN (Thank you Heather Dubrow for the quote)

Don’t have any boyfriends in High School, you’re way too young and it will just bring too much drama to your life!  You can have friend boys, but no boyfriends, GOT IT?

I'm sure there's 100 more things I should be telling you, but you're just going to have to learn the rest on your own.  Besides, you probably won't listen to a word I say anyways, you like to learn on your own then tell your mom 10 years later that she was INDEED right!

Love,

Your older, more mature, more boring, fatter self