Why I should be a Real Housewife

I love drinking Champs and by Champs I mean Andre Dry Sparkling Champagne.  Ya know the kind that’s $4.99 a bottle, yeah I like that.  Maybe I would switch to Rose if I was a housewife, I dunno the jury’s out on that one…

I’m VERY opinionated.  90% of the time I actually say what I’m thinking, I would definitely get in some cat fights...

I was born to be a Stay at Home Wife.  I think I would do an excellent job being in charge of maids, kitchen staff, pool boys, nannies etc. I would lounge by the pool all day with Champs in hand and a Bud Light in the other.

I have long blonde hair, isn't that a requirement for the RHOC?

I’m very flexible, I would have no problem going on impromptu vacations to Costa Rica, Vegas, Paris, you name it, I’ll be there!

I am perfectly fine with Day drinking, all day everyday...

I could totally design my own line of something.  Hmm… Alcohol, purses, perfume, makeup, clothing, personal toys, the possibilities are endless….  I think I would design my own lipstick line infused with alcohol.  Somehow when you apply it, you get a little shot of Alcohol. Yeah that’s it Alcohol Infused Lip Plump.  The Flavors would be: Sex on the beach, Cosmopolitan, Daiquiri, Margarita, Natural Light (for the redneck woman) – what do you think, would you buy this?

I could be a news anchor; I mean seriously I would HAVE to be better than Alexis. That was just plain embarrassing! She claims that she quit, but I guarantee she was asked to leave…

Instead of an All White Party I would host an All Pink Party, OBVIOUSLY!  This would Include pink panthers, flamingos, girls with their body painted in different shades of pink.  Everyone would HAVE to wear pink. Piece of cake!

Could you be a Real Housewife??